Before reading The Night of the Gun by David Carr I knew that drug life probably wasn't the most glamorous, but I didn't notice how bad it was until Carr described a good morning for a drug addict. He vividly describes, "Mornings for an addict involve waking up in a room where everything implicates him. Even if there is no piss or vomit-oh, blessed be the small wonders-there is the tipped-over bottle, the smashed phone, the bright midday light coming through the rip in the shade that says another day has started without you" (91). This passage caught me off guard when I read it first. I had to go back and read it a couple of more times. It still amazes me that's what people actually live like. Not only do they live like that, but they choose to. Why anyone would choose this, I'm not sure. It just goes to show the true addictive power of these illegal substances. If this is how you wake up, and still, at the end of the day you can't wait to do it again, there must be something inescapable pulling you in.
Another downside of this life is what it makes you do. Carr talks to one of his old buddies who recalls running into him at the airport, "I remember thinking how paranoid you looked. I saw you a few weeks later, and you told me you had smuggled a ton of coke by taping it to your body that day" (101). The drugs capture you, forcing you to do things sane people wouldn't. When on drugs, Carr loses all power he has over himself, giving it up to the drugs. He can no longer decide for himself, he now must always consider the drugs while making decisions. His lifestyle slowly takes over all aspects of his life.
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